Seasons

When I was a child growing up in Philadelphia, holidays like Christmas and Easter were pretty predictable. Everybody went to church in the morning and gathered at my grandparents house in the afternoon for a special meal and dessert. The kids played in the family room or basement while the adults gathered in the kitchen and formal living room for idle conversation and appetizers. Nobody was divorced and there were no rifts in the family, so each year was pretty much the same. I liked that.

As I grew into adulthood, I moved to south Florida and things pretty much stayed the same, except now I went to my Aunt and Uncles house for each holiday. Most of us still went to church and we all gathered together to break bread and hang out. Occasionally the guest list would change to include others who had no family in town or other plans. Again, it was nice and predictable.

Unfortunately my Aunt and Uncle came to a point where their marriage had ended and holiday's began to be more unpredictable. One year we dined in a small efficiency where my Uncle was living, we spent some holidays at my cousins homes, sometimes we cooked and other times we ordered pre-made meals; in addition to all that, the times we choose to eat have varied from year to year. The holiday's have no longer become anything I can count on.

As a single mother I am struggling to maintain some sense of normalcy and predictability for my son in regards to the holidays. I realize that life is like a never ending series of seasons and we have to be able to bend with the changing wind so that we don't break; but, it can be quite challenging at times. I've come to realize that I only have control over certain things and I have to use that to my advantage.

I can control the special traditions my little nuclear family has, like dying Easter eggs and checking the Advent calender each day for chocolates in anticipation of Christ's birth. I can control the importance placed on God and prayer by putting our church and worship time ahead of any gatherings or festivities. I can even control who we choose to eat with, thereby creating a new tradition where we share our holiday with other friends and family who we wouldn't normally get to see. It's a strange season I'm experiencing right now and I'm not entirely sure how I feel about it. I don't know what to call it and I'm not quite sure where it's headed; but, I'm hoping for a nice spring when the ground begins to thaw.